sex, desire and relationships
issue iii
contributors:
Sophie L
COVER SHOOT
Direction Mia Maxwell @miamaxwelll
Shot by Faith Aylward @didudietho
Makeup and Hair Goodie May-Johnson @goodiemaykup
Bra by Maya Scarlette @mayascarlettex
Styling Mia Maxwell @miamaxwelll
Featuring Enam Asiama @enamasiama
'Sexual play can be infinite':
A Conversation with Ruby Stevenson
Ruby is a sex educator who works for sexual health charity Brook, runs pleasure and sex toy workshops, and Body Love Sketch Club with Rosy Pendlebaby. Georgia Mitchell spoke to Ruby about her mission to refocus pleasure in conversations about sex...
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Debunking the Virginity Myth
As a society, we’re obsessed with virginity.
It’s a hot topic in secondary school with whispered conversations at lunch on who’s ‘done it’, at pre-drinks during freshers’ week where some of us fess up to not having ‘lost it’ yet, and it can even crop up years later over drinks with friends...
Sexuality isn't reserved for the Able Bodied
When you have a chronic illness and disability, you become accustomed to dealing with other peoples unwanted pity. You're often viewed as a ‘poor thing’ rather than a sexual being, when in reality it's not a dichotomy. I am a woman living in a less able body and simultaneously a sexual being with desires. It's really not a difficult concept to grasp. The societal projection of people with chronic illnesses and/or disabilities...
The Second Life of Self Esteem: An Interview with Rebecca Lucy Taylor
The name Self Esteem appears to denote a project with clear intentions - about empowerment, perhaps, and self-knowledge, definitely - but pop artist Rebecca Lucy Taylor tells Georgia Mitchell that when she came up with the moniker, it was just ‘a great band name.’ Rebecca’s music under ‘Self Esteem’ demands introspection, not only from its listeners, but from the artist herself...
Sexuality and Culture: A Love Story
Sexuality and Culture: A Love Story photoseries by Bilan Suliman...
QUEER KINK
Kink, an umbrella term with fairly satisfying phonetics, is often used interchangeably with ‘BDSM’ - a multi-lettered acronym that Wikipedia helpfully describes as “erotic practices or roleplaying involving bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism, and other related interpersonal...
Friendship as Resistance to Patriarchy
Through film, the overflowing supply of romance novels in the “women’s section” in every bookshop, romantic love is cast as the centrepiece of a woman’s world; it is where all her aspirations eventually converge. The attainment of romantic love satisfies many essential human needs. It offers emotional and financial support in the form of tax...
Mutations of the Body
Mutations of the Body is a project of evolution. The sequence of photographs studies the uncomfortable state of nakedness, unveiling the categorization of a gender non-conforming individual, which occurs based on their genitals. Bodies are situated as “sexed” in the biological approach, establishing either the male or female...
Before I Knew Any Lesbians
‘Before I knew any lesbians’ is a portrayal of my younger self and her disconnect to queer life and culture. As a young gay woman, queer possibility models are also pop culture idols. Teenage fandom becomes a lifeline...
ENAM ASIAMA
A stunning photoseries directed and styled by FEM Editor-in-Chief Mia Maxwell exploring...
Family Business: An Interview with Elsie and Fred
In 2012, Ryan and myself joined forces to launch a vintage shirt and t-shirt company. The idea for that I guess came from many trips to Thailand sourcing unique clothing and accessories for the boutique I also owned at the time in our home town in Coventry.
We developed our brand, moving away...
'Where are you from?'
I was sitting in a bar with two female friends, describing a pattern I’d noticed. Recently, I’d started to take note of how solicitous men opened conversation with me. I thought back over flirtations in bars and pubs, and reread old Tinder conversations, all starting the same way. Each of these men began, by asking me where I was from. My theory was bolstered a few minutes later, when a man in the queue for drinks questioned my...
Staying at Home
Staying at home, by Precious Opara, is a series about getting to know yourself and becoming your own friend when you live alone...
What Not to Say to Married Dykes
A photoseries, directed by Mia Maxwell, featuring Maggie and Rene Matic...
What I Wish I Was Taught Growing Up
If I had the right sex education, what would I have known earlier on? What could I have avoided?
I don’t like to play the blame game, but I think its fair to say that school, as well as my upbringing, did fail me when it came to...
High Pitched and Moist: An Interview with Tami T
If like me you’re a massive Tami T fan, you’d know how exciting it felt to find out she was finally dropping her first album. Many queer people that I know of for the last couple years have loved, partied and cried to Tami T’s music, even incorporated it in their art. Tami has a truly unique voice in music, her bold lyrics and extraordinary music makes...
Conversations with my cousin
KA: Have you always been confident?
CA: I wouldn't say I have always been a confident person, especially in the early years because I was young and lacked experience. I didn't know how to make sense of self love. I think the turning point for me was when I decided, I was happy with myself. I choose to do what makes me happy and if what I'm doing doesn't physically affect others, then why should I deny myself that happiness?...
Love in Black and White
Florescent lights and cobalt blue walls; that was the setting, when I met my love. Over a sea of faces and voices in waves cascading around me - the universe presented him to me. I was eleven years young, and unbeknown to me, this human would play a role in my future (deep inhale.) How beautiful and precious is that moment? At that moment, as significant as it remains...
Colonised Desire
The idea of colonised desire is rooted in the structural and systemic construction of desire. It’s rooted in systems of meaning that operate within our society. These systems of meaning are oppressive. Desire is an intersecting network of power which decides whether or not you are loveable or worthy. It’s insidious because you think it’s natural; because you think you chose your partners...
Ask Me Anything
I've always been the type of person that quite enjoys 'educating' people about disability. I like that people feel comfortable asking me questions about my disability because to me it means they are not judging, they are curious. As I got older the question of 'sex and disability'...
Intimacy Diaries: Volume 4 (TW r*pe)
Grace Jackson’s ‘Intimacy Diaries Volume 4’ grew from her ongoing project One in Five, which gathers the testimonies of women who are survivors of rape...
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Erotic Poetry by Womxn
KIN
In a time of commodification of self, our experiences of sex, sexuality, and love have, of necessity, hardened into weary transactions. Discarding the emotional, sensual, and spiritual aspects...